OPEN THREAD--Turkey Day

So, is it a day we eat turkeys or a day turkeys eat crow?

And, this list in my email inbox made me smile. Enjoy:

• If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

• I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.

• I live in my own little world. But it's OK. They know me here.

• I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.

• I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

• I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore, I am perfect.

• How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

• Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"

• A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "...that was fun!"-

• I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

• When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."

• The worst thing about accidents in the kitchen is eating them.

• Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

• Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

• My husband says I never listen to him (at least I think that's what he said).

• If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called LABOR!

• Wouldn't you know it...Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.